Can You be Married and Still Be a Single Mom?

I was married with my husband for about eight years at one point, when my daughter was about a year old. He moved to ๐Ÿฅญแด˜แดœแด‡ส€แด›แด ส€ษชแด„แด๐Ÿ–๏ธ to finish his residency to be a family doctor.
For me it was extremely tough being a single mom, working full time and supporting my husband financially in ๐Ÿ๏ธแด˜แดœแด‡ส€แด›แด ส€ษชแด„แด๐Ÿš.  Lonely at times and always exhausted.

I remember one time, I had to go shopping for food and my one-year-old refused to sit in the ๐“ผ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“น๐“น๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฌ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฝ.  When I put her in the cart, she screamed.  So, I used her ๐Ÿช™๐–˜๐–™๐–—๐–”๐–‘๐–‘๐–Š๐–— ๐Ÿ’Žto shop. I couldn’t get very much food or other items in there. 

One point I had to get ๐Ÿงป ๐“ฝ๐“ธ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ฝ ๐“น๐“ช๐“น๐“ฎ๐“ป and that is all I could get into the ๐–˜๐–™๐–—๐–”๐–‘๐–‘๐–Š๐–—. She refused to have anything on top of her, so it had to be under the stroller. I bought ๐“ฝ๐“ธ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ฝ ๐“น๐“ช๐“น๐“ฎ๐“ป ๐Ÿงป and dropped it off in the car.  Back into the store with her and her ๐–˜๐–™๐–—๐–”๐–‘๐–‘๐–Š๐–—.  

I bought as much as I could possibly fit into that ๐–˜๐–™๐–—๐–”๐–‘๐–‘๐–Š๐–—. It was quite funny. I don't know how many times I went back and forth filling up my ๐–˜๐–™๐–—๐–”๐–‘๐–‘๐–Š๐–—, going to the car dumping it all in there and coming back.

Then going back and getting the rest of the stuff. It must have been at least three times.  I of course I went to different cashiers because I didn't want them to realize how many times I was coming in and out of the store just to buy the essentials.

At one point I met a friend of mine who was shopping with her husband and baby. They just looked at me and my stroller full of items. They told me I should use a ๐“ผ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“น๐“น๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฌ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฝ, but I told them that my baby refused to sit in a ๐“ฌ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฝ. I know they though I was strange, but what was I going to do. My kid was picky about the shopping cart. It was either eat or not eat. So, I picked eat and just went with the flow.

It was not funny at the time, now I can look back and I understand so much more. Also, I can laugh about it.

It was tough and embarrassing all at the same time. I didn’t have anyone to rely on to help me. I had aunts and friends, but I didn’t ask for help with the shopping or babysitting. I should have asked more. I was just expecting that they would all offer to help, but that never happened. 

By the end of the year, I was exhausted. My boss was complaining about my ability to work, but he never offered any help. One of my aunts was angry at me for asking for help and my husband’s family never called to help me out. 

I was on my own. That was the loneliest I think I have ever been. 

Next time you know a friend or family member’s spouse is away for a long time, tell them you’re available if they ever need someone to talk to or buy them some ๐“ฝ๐“ธ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ฝ ๐Ÿงป ๐“น๐“ช๐“น๐“ฎ๐“ป. 
And the bosses out there, give them a hand. Maybe they just need a day off or less responsibilities at that moment in time. Try putting yourself in their shoes.  

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